no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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