Are we in a gay sports bar?
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize