I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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