Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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