Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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