matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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