I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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