haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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