I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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