i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize