I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Randomize