nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
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He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
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Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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