life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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