I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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