After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Randomize