Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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