so explain again why im purple
no
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize