My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize