lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
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Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
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Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
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