i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
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