He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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