FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize