I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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