is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
This is the high leading the old right now
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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