Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
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