guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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