I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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