i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize