"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Moan for me like Helen Keller
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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