i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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