Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
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Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
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So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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