dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize