so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize