i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize