She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize