Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize