one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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