We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize