Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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