You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I've blown a few things in my day
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
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