big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize