You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize