You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
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Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
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View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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