question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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