What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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