I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize