I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
why is half of my head shaved?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize