My nipple is on Facebook.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
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she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
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Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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