so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
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I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
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the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I woke up under a house in Key West
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