jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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