I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
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You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
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Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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