oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize